Flat Stanley Comes to Arizona!

There you have it, folks. Mr. Stanley has braved the summer heat and visited the fair state of Arizona. Most visitors come in the winter when the weather is a comfortable daytime-shirt-sleeve temperature and a balmy evening-light-jacket temperature. But, no, not Flat Stanley. He wants all Arizona has to offer.

Our hats go off to this gentleman and our invitation goes out to all stalwart fans: come experience the real desert first-hand; come enjoy the lighter crowds due to a lack of tourists; enjoy phenomenal prices on exotic resorts; bring your arthritic bones to dry out in the desert heat. Bring chaptick and water, too.

Welcome, Flat Stanley!

• The saguaro cactus is the largest cactus found in the U.S. It can grow as high as a five-story building and is native to the Sonoran Desert, which stretches across southern Arizona and northern Mexico.
• A saguaro can store up to nine tons of water.
• It is a protected species and you could spend more than a year in prison for cutting one down.

• Arizona's disparate climate can yield both the highest and lowest temperatures across the nation in the same day.
• The hottest temperature recorded in Arizona was 128 at Lake Havasu City on June 29, 1994. The coldest was 40 below zero at Hawley Lake on January 7, 1971.
• Rainfall averages for Arizona range from less than three inches in the deserts to more than 30 inches per year in the mountains.

Let's hear it for Stanley!!

Photo by Jeannal Baker

Just had to share a friend's photos of a blooming cactus in their yard in Sun City Grand, AZ. The flowers are large and waxy and last only one day. Spectacular!

Jeannal Baker

Solutions

Parenting. For the toughest job on the earth, there is no required training or preparation: no diploma, certificate, degree, or license. Most anyone can become a parent, whether they are skilled or not.

In last week's blog I shared some of my outrage over child abuse. As a volunteer on a Foster Care Review Board in Arizona, I read many cases that break my heart. Fortunately, by the time a child enters foster care and I'm reading their story, they are safe physically and most often, emotionally. Foster parents (and grandparents) are angels God uses to save children. I admire them greatly.

Parents whose children are taken from their care, are offered support services to help them establish stable, loving homes. Many take advantage of these services and do get their children returned. However, too many go through the motions just to fulfill a requirement or ignore the help altogether.

Parents whose children are in foster care are offered:

• Parenting classes
• Substance abuse services
• Psychological counseling
• Daycare
• Transportation to therapy sessions
• Parent aides to teach one-on-one parenting skills
• A case manager to oversee their progress

This is great and I'm glad our state has these services available. However, why not establish some training, education, or skills BEFORE the baby comes?

Advice to young people:
Get your own life cleaned-up and strengthened before becoming a parent. Make sure the home you're establishing is stable, safe, and loving. Take classes, read books, learn about child development--not just a child's physical needs but their emotional and spiritual needs, as well.

Possible training for parenthood:

• Books

Read everything you can about the task of parenting. Check out the author for his/her credentials. Do their philosophies make sense? Do they mesh with your values? Does their plan for child-raising fit your personality? Is the plan do-able? Most importantly: are children's needs and well-being emphasized?

• Classes

Take parenting classes at churches, the YMCA, Community Centers, schools. Anywhere they're offered.

• Mentors

Seek mentors, both official and unofficial. Find a family that seems to be working--not perfectly but stable and happy. Become friends, ask them for advice, model what you like about their parenting and discard what doesn't fit you.

• Respite

Breaks from the 24/7 of parenting are almost impossible to get, but they are valuable in helping parents stay strong for the lengthy task of raising children to responsible adulthood. You're blessed if you have extended family nearby who can help. Alternatives are friends or trusted babysitters. In my own family, the more children we had, the more important it was for my husband and me to get away on dates or quick weekend trips. Think creatively. Perhaps you and a friend can swap services so everyone benefits--even the kids.

We all feel anger when we read of parents neglecting their children. We should do what we can to encourage parents to take precautions BEFORE their children need the foster care system.

* * * * * * *

If you want to serve the children of Arizona, consider becoming a CASA volunteer or a volunteer member of a Foster Care Review Board. Click here for more information on two worthwhile programs:

CASA

Foster Care Review Board

Quail Family

I was at the dining room table working on my laptop when I looked up, and there by my patio door was a family of quail--two adults and five tiny chicks. They were feasting on the colony of ants gathered near the screen door.

How exciting. I think they would have come in the house if the door had been open! Fairly quickly, the adults flew up on top of our fence and squawked their commands. The chicks followed obediently. When Mama and Papa flew into the next yard, I thought, No way can those babies get over that six-foot fence. But sure enough, they flew--awkwardly--and joined their parents in the next yard offering up juicy bugs.

Ours is a quail-friendly yard: no dogs, no kids, no huge desert tortoise (our neighborhood has one), lots of bugs, and Bermuda grass with abundant seed sprouts. We often get quail visitors and it makes me smile every time.

Why am I so enamored of quail?

• They travel in close-knit family groups, often in a long conga line
• The little ones obey Mom and Dad--one squawk and they respond
• Dad often sits atop the fence keeping an eye out for danger while his family eats
• They run funny

Protective Parents and Obedient Children: quite the formula for success.

I do some volunteer work with the Foster Care system in Arizona. It breaks my heart when I read of children abused or uncared for by their own parents. A thought that runs through my mind is, "Even animals instinctively care for their young. It's only the human animal that..."

Several years ago, Disney put out an entertaining documentary called Bears. While watching I was mesmerized at how adept Mama Bear was at teaching her cubs to hunt for food. God created that instinct. It's in humans, too, but we need to tap into it and take precautions to preserve it.

I am outraged when I read that humans sometimes choose:

• drugs over children
• alcohol over children
• boyfriend/girlfriend over children
• own selfish desires over children
• Etc., etc., etc. (Sadly, there are many etceteras)

Even the animal kingdom will fight to the death for their offspring.

Juicy bugs and grass seeds--doesn't get much better!



Encouragement for Single Parents...

Parenting is the toughest job you'll ever have. It's 24/7, no vacation days, no sick leave, and no certification requirements or training workshops. Professional development often comes in the form of trial and error and/or commiserating with other parents who may be just as perplexed as you!

The benefits? Priceless. Nothing speaks like the smile of a child, whether it's your own or someone else's. Nothing speaks like a child holding your hand, giving you a hug, or sitting by your side reading a book to you. Nothing grabs your heart like the love of a child.

I used to tell my high school students (many who were just a few years away from having children), to learn parenting skills watch old reruns of the Andy Griffith Show. What? Yes. Once you get beyond the black and white format of the show, there are some real nuggets there.

Think of it. Andy Taylor (Griffith) was a man before his time as a single dad in the late 1950s and early 60s. Of course, he did have Aunt Bea. Wouldn't we all love to have an Aunt Bea cleaning our houses and baking cookies in our kitchens? But, look at the attributes of Andy as a dad to dear, sweet, loveable Opie:

• He's calm & never overreacts (quite a contrast to the Don Knotts' character).
• He's consistent. Opie knows even a staged temper tantrum won't get his dad to cave. (That's a great episode.)
• He's not afraid to teach Opie responsibility. (When Opie kills a mama bird, Andy makes him hand feed the babies until they can fly away.)
• Andy Taylor follows up discipline with loving interaction.
• Sheriff Taylor spends time with his son. Opie knows he's the most important person in his life.

I could go on and on, but you'd accuse me of watching too much television. I haven't seen the show in years, but it was my lunchtime entertainment when I was a stay-at-home mom eons ago.

This brings me to a special group of parents: single parents. Theirs is a tough job:

• They are stretched to the max
• They endure family stresses some of us can't imagine
• They have the same fears all parents have about their children becoming responsible adults
• Much of what they do, they do alone

A group really overlooked is single dads. Single moms have more support programs and more publicity for their struggles. Let's face it--there are more of them. However, there is a growing number of men with 100% custody of their children. The resources for these men are limited. Even in the church single moms get support not available to faithful fathers who are trying to do it all alone.

Take heart single dads: we admire you and I hope to advertise your plight so there will be more support for the tough job you are doing. When  you're at your wit's end and need encouragement, pull up some old Andy Griffith reruns.

Sadly, Andy Griffith died on July 3, 2012. Many fans miss Sheriff Andy Taylor and Matlock.
Click here to view a delightful photo gallery of the Andy Griffith Show.

Mayberry just isn't the same!